Nobody Knows I’m Stoned

I’ll Have The Cream Of Cunt Please Waiter

So it has been a while since my last post… But don’t worry I’m still finding you the sexiest British girls for your wanking pleasure…

So what has happened since my last post…

Well world financial markets have collapsed and Gordon “Knight in shining amour” Brown has saved the day… Lets not forget this is the man who was chancellor for the last decade, under his guidance we have found ourselves in shit creek with no paddle.

Lewis Hamilton won the Formula One World Championship. I have to say I’m glad about this. There has been a lot of crap, rumours and everything else thrown at him. End of the Day his British and we should get behind him.

Barack Obama became the next president of the U.S.A. Now perhaps it is just me but has anyone else noticed that he isn’t black!!!! To get technical he is mixed race so 50% black 50% white… So looks like America has selected another white President!?!? But no one has yet to say this… But never mind, personally I was hoping the McCain would get in, mostly because Sarah Palin is quite a MILF…

But the most important development is that John Sergeant has quite Strictly Come Dancing. Now that’s a real shame.

Don’t Worry about that! Just get over to Cream My Cunt for some UK Creampie porn

Dear Oh Dear

It’s a Brown Bashing Day, well why not. It seems strange that Gordon Brown did not interfere in Zimbabwe in the same way that we dived into Iraq. Now there are 2 theories behind this..

1. NO OIL

2. If brown were to start denouncing old Bob Mugabe for being a dictator on the fact that the election was rigged with wide spread threats and intimidation. Maybe people will start to look at Old Gordy and say “Oi Brown, so when exactly did you win an election”.

The problem is we now live under a dictatorship by a man, who under his control has steered the countries finances in to what we see splashed over the front pages of all the newspapers.

With all this said it is quite clear that the professionals have no idea so we are going to hand it over to the amateurs. The Suburban Amateurs. And with everyone tightening their purse strings were giving you more amateurs for your money with 4 hot galleries to perv over.

What a rip off

So it would appear that peace and a power sharing deal has come to Zimbabwe, I have not seen the full details of the agreement but from the reports that I have read it would seem that.

Robert Mugabe gets control of the army and it still in control of Parliament. Morgan Tsvangirai gets to carry Mugabe’s luggage of Foreign trips..

So all in all you could say the country is well on the way to recovery. But seriously once foreign companies have started to invest their money back into Zimbabwe how soon will Morgan Tsvangirai have a horrible fatal accident, I don’t know maybe falling in the shower and getting shot in the back 20 times!!

While were on the subject of Amateurs get yourself over to Suburban Amateurs.

The Circus Begins

John McCain has announced his running mate. So chances are there will be a gun touting redneck in the administration. If I recall didn’t Dick Cheney shoot someone when he was out hunting! So the republican party seems to be setting a precedent with that one.

Apparently John McCain will be making sweeping changes in the white house. First off he will be putting in a stair lift.

It does come as some surprise that the Republican party could only put forward a man who came second to George Bush 8 years ago in the party vote.

But I will be backing McCain to the hilt…. We all need oven chips?!?!

Why not take a look at Real Couples it may not be politics but it sure is more entertaining….

Once in a while I might need to plug something for someone… This is one of those times…. Everybody needs sexy toys I know I sure have used a few over the years.. So why not take a look at this cool site below and get some spice back into your sex life..

If you’re looking at this, chances are, your partner just isn’t as enticing as she used to be. Instead of giving up on her and recoiling into the (admittedly sexy) worlds of these porn stars, why not spice things up with a
special sex toy for couples Ashley sex toys? My hot friend Ashley sells all kinds of gadgets designed to put the heat back into even the coldest bedroom — things like vibrator kits and anal sex toys . Her store has enough in stock to keep you lovers doing it like newlyweds long after the honeymoon is over!

Merry Christmas

Well it is official Christmas is here, the shops have started out with their Christmas displays and the usual tat gets its  seasonal parade. Of course this is good marketing, what with the credit crunch and all. It is probably better to get the  money out of the poor fuckers now as by Xmas they will be broke and hocking the wife’s wedding ring to buy the children the latest piece of mass produced plastic crap from the far east. Myself, I’m a simple man and would be quite happy to find Naomi Model In stockings on Christmas morning.

What A Waste Of Money

So the Olympics is over then! all that fuss and for just two weeks, I have to say I was surprised that we got so many  medals. Although when you think of how much money we have invested to achieve these.. Somewhere in the region of £1 million + per medal. You get to thinking maybe we would have been better off buying some on eBay and investing those XXX Millions into oh, I don’t know, our failing schools, terrible hospitals or maybe get some more police. But what do I know… What I do know is if you want real value for money take a look at the hot bitty at Real Punting. Where you get more pussy for your pounds…

The Future Is .ALT

I don’t care about many things… And there are even less things that I will get out of bed for…

Just for the moment we will concentrate on the latter and as it’s the weekend here are three of the hottest girls from the all British site Punk Grl… While we are on the subject have you taken a look at the total
babe from Paramore. You really should.

Dumb But Not Blonde

So I’m in B & Q and overhear a husband and wife talking… So wifey says to him “I want a door that opens”. I’m thinking opening will be high on your list of priority when purchasing such an item, really looking for a door that doesn’t open it looking for a wall. In Bed With Faith your not going to up against it with Faith so take a look at her and her 32GG bags of fun.

On another note It was surprising to see the amount of cars in the B&Q car park with polish number plates… Not wanting to be stereotypical! but OMG

Time To Look For Another Job

So My mother was looking for a new computer keyboard so I said I would take her down to PC World to look for one, I needed a new NAS drive so thought I would take a look at their wares.. So my mother went up to the dick in the uniform. I listened to him being quite patronizing about the whole situation. When he was done I asked him the simple question…. “Where are your NAS drives”.. “What is a NAS drive” Well what can you say I choose my words carefully… “You work in a computer shop and you DON’T know what a nas drive is”… “urm, er, urm” “It’s a Network Drive” NAS, Network Attached Storage Drive… “Oh, Oh, We have them but they are not called that, I have never heard them called that”…. So riddle me this then monkey boy when you visit PCWORLD.CO.UK and type “nas drive” into the little search box, why would it bring up 2 results…. Perhaps it is time that you searched the help wanted ads because if your a representation of pc worlds support I think we can all do without a computer. You Know where you won’t get this trouble… Only Carla there a girl who knows her disk drives.

Gold, Silver, Bronze… What Do You Get For Last?

So the Olympics are on us once again. Should be a good excuse to see a lot of scantily clad girl running around add to that a lot of beefed up guys on steroids and it should be a whole barrel of laughs. I personally think there should be a lot more drugs in sport the idea of a lot of athletes off their heads on magic mushrooms running the 100 meters while being chased by a 12 foot invisible rabbit or wrestlers loved up on ecstasy while trying to grab hold of each other, this would no doubt bring a much greater television audience to this summers games. Lets face it we are not going to do that well. So you might as well take a look Only Melanie at the very sexy and reflect on something we are good at.

Put Some Clothes On And Bring In The Trash

So I read in the paper the other day.

Shoplifters can face an on the spot fine of £80

Putting out your rubbish on the wrong day you can face an on the spot fine of £115

I’m sorry but is this really sending out the right message when the country is as fucked up as it already is.. Are we to believe “littering” is considered worse than theft.

Go take a look at sexy tattooed Justine from Justine’s Bedroom, you never know you might forget the idiocy.

Safety First

So I see a girl driving along with her I-Pod on today.. Earphone in and everything.. Now surely that’s not safe? I mean the thing is statistically women are less likely to have an accident. However I put this down to 2 things.

1. They never get to a speed at which they can actually cause an accident.

2. 98.5% of the time a woman is driving in her car she is actually trying to park her car.

So really the safest option all round is Girly Riders

Maybe in a few Years

Well let be honest now you expect Tim Henman to be out of Wimbledon by the quarter finals! You just don’t expect him to be commentating all out from a sore throat! Not all is lost though. Wimbledon in a wrapped up in a heart beat.

Lots of Skimpily clad females bounce around the courts, A good time is had by all

In lieu of our of our consummate professional athletes why not take a peek at,Suburban Amateurs.

The Hottest Girl In The World

I may have said it once or twice but Naughty Belle has to be the hottest girl on the planet. Talking about the hottest on the planet, What about Spain winning the Euro Championship. I have to say that 1-0 did not tell the story but I as elated that the Germans were well and truly beaten. I had held out hope that the Turkish would be in the final but alas, there last minute flurries were probably the most enjoyable part of the whole tournament.